My husband, Pete, loves apples. His formative years spent in the apple country of upstate New York left a lasting mark on him. He eats at least an apple a day, preferably a crisp, tart McIntosh. Even better, he loves apples baked into a pie. I’m not talking about a mere platonic relationship here. This is true love. He really enjoys a towering slice of deep-dish apple pie.
On the other hand, I am allergic to apples. Eating even one bite causes me severe digestive distress, to put it politely. So of course we up and married each other.
Ever have one of those nights where you wake up at 3 am and your brain turns on and starts going around and around, wondering about stuff? You aren’t lying awake worrying about paying the bills or fretting about the assignment due next week. In fact there’s really no reason to be awake… except you are. And you’re thinking things like:
- When it rains, why don’t sheep shrink?
- How do porcupines mate without stabbing each other?
- If bulls are colorblind, why are matadors’ capes red?
Sound familiar? If so, then you’ll understand where the rest of this post is coming from. If you have no idea of what I’m talking about, continue reading—and don’t blame me the next time you’re wide awake in the middle of the night, wondering.